Just Another Scovi Day

In order to illustrate what I mean by spicy and what it’s like to be a Scovi (for those who aren’t and DON’T know) I’m going to give a breakdown of my Saturday.

I picked up my friend and drove for a day of gaming with a group of mutual friends. Along the way we stopped in at a restaurant called China Bistro. Now, I have had mixed results when ordering spicy food here. Again, I think it comes down to the human element and them believing me about just how much spice I can handle. I’ll do a full review of China Bistro in a later post, but for now I’ll just say the food is pretty good.

Saturday, I luckily had my secret weapon.  For my friend, my ex-roomate, and college buddy... IS ASIAN! Specifically Taiwanese, but that’s a moot point. You can call it racist, rude, non PC, or whatever, it doesn’t take away from the fact that it’s TRUE: certain places like this, at least until you’re such a regular they know your car, first name, and possibly other personal information, cater to the masses and stereotypes.  Meaning, getting spicy food can be a problem.

Instead of tempting fate by insulting the waitress and hoping for her wrath to come out in an attempted spicy homicide (see my last post) I did what I normally do, and try to explain my situation. I ordered the Pad Thai and asked for it  to be spicy, as spicy as they could possibly make it.

She responded, “Thai hot? Okay.”

I know I gave her a disgruntled look, because I’ve heard this before. There is a difference between “American Thai Hot” and “Traditional,” and unfortunately I get lumped in with the former ALL the time. So, to help point out my case, I said, “Even hotter, if you can. Trust me I can handle it. I have Ghost Peppers out in my truck RIGHT NOW.”

My roommate smirked and added , “He wants you to KILL HIM.”

Of course I was like, “Well no... but please TRY.”

They exchanged some words that I, as usual, were not privy to and she left for a while. When she came back, she brought me a small container of chilies in fire oil and my delicious plate:

As she was leaving she looked over her shoulder and did a perfect Taken impersonation. “Good Luck.” <iframe width="854" height="510" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/1zNdw4DaUM8" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

The fore boarding sense of doom in her words sent a chill through my spine that filled me with a sense of childish delight that would confuse and terrify Stephen King. I clapped and hopped around in my seat as I stared at it joyfully and commented “Ohhhh... I like this. It came with a spooky forshadowing.”

I pulled out my chopsticks and took a bite. I immediately dumped the entire container of chilies on it, mixed it in, and began to eat. A couple minutes later she returned and clung onto one of the seats and asked, “Are you okay? Is it spicy enough?”

I shrugged and looked at her in between bites and said casually, “Would like it a bit hotter actually.” For reference: no tears, no runny nose, no flushed face, and no trouble breathing, talking or any other outward sign of affect. The waitress looked like I scared her spirit right out of her. After a moment of just staring at me silently, she ran in the back and came back with another container of the chilies. As she dropped if off, she just half laughed, “You’re crazy.” As a side note, she spent a good portion of the time AWAY from my table for the rest of the experience. Not in a neglectful way, but definitely noticeable considering her previous regular rounds before that point. It was a pleasant memory:

Not such a fan of that oil though.

Later that day my gaming group went to get some food from Ed’s Drive In. This was my first experience there. Oddly enough, they didn’t have chilies cheese fries. I was rather distraught at this. But, after sampling their chili, I can understand why. I ordered a Tenderloin, Chili, and fries (obviously planning on making my own chili fires). The Tenderloin sandwhich was very good by itself, and I made it better with some slices of fresh ghost pepper(the red rings):

The chili was a lost cause to begin with. Way too tomato, not enough spices, and for god sakes why did they add random spaghetti noodles? I didn’t order Chili mac! Don’t even get me started on the greese (and I don’t mean in the god way). Sigh. Peppers can only make good food better, they can‘t make crummy food better. Frankly, using peppers on it would have been a waste of peppers, I’d rather eat them straight to help cover up that taste.

After that someone pulled out a chocolate cake and started cutting it up for dessert. I could tell from my seat it was one of those really “rich” frosting cakes, and, generally speaking, not all to my liking. A solution presented itself when one of my spice loving friends got a ghost pepper off me for their own meal. He cut off the tip, ate that, and added a bit to his meal. He didn’t want the entire thing and, knowing how I am about wasting stuff, he asked if I wanted it back. An Idea is born!

Yes. That is correct. I put a Ghost Chili Pepper, 1,000,000 SHU, on a piece of Chocolate cake. It was delicious... Don’t judge me!

So there you go. Lunch. Dinner. Even Dessert.  Spiciness is ALWAYS relevant for a Scovi.

Happy Caping :-D

-Kirk